Mirror, Mirror

I can't believe I'm about to say this. It's only taken me 30+ years.

I think I prefer myself with less makeup.

It could be that I take way too long applying it. Or that today my skin is especially dry and flaky, though the natural oiliness is bound to appear in 5 minutes and fix that anyway. Or that I just finished the book 7 last night and can't stop thinking about all the excess in my life.

Regardless, I've turned a corner.

I have a hard time doing things halfway, generally. I'm a perfectionist, so if it's not done perfectly and completely, forget it. This has changed somewhat since having a child, but it is still my natural tendency. So I either want to do full makeup, or wear none at all.

But I have found an in between.* 

And who am I trying to impress anyway? Why do I care so much about my makeup being perfect? Of course, I want to be presentable. And in the appropriate situation, appear professional. But when I'm putting on full makeup (taking the full amount of time that it takes my husband to clean out - I'm talking a deep clean - both of our cars) to meet a close friend at Target for coffee and a little browsing, it's a little over the top, if I do say so myself. This friend has seen me makeup-less and doesn't care. But she always seems so put together. Dressed very nicely, with her own makeup looking good. And I'm a stay-at-home mom maybe trying to prove a little too hard that I still can look nice and it's my one evening out this whole week and everyone is judging anyway.

Really? Where is my value? Is my identity in my perfectly applied primer, concealer, foundation, bronzer, blush, eye shadow, liner, mascara, and lip gloss? I'm annoying myself just typing this out. I am deciding no.

It's exhausting putting on this show. 

*My in between regimen includes a "luminizing" moisture tint, cheek stain, and mascara. Oh, and the most amazing lip balm (Dior Lip Glow) my sister gave me. Also, the full makeup will come out on occasion. While my husband prefers my face au natural, even he thinks smoky eyes are hot. And even though I'm a stay-at-home mom, we still go on dates, thankyouverymuch.