I was the candle lighter in my mother's cousin's wedding in 1990.
(That's me on the right!)
When you write you lay out a line of words . . .the line of words is a hammer . . .the line of words feels for cracks in the firmament . . .the line of words fingers your own heart . . .you wield it, and it digs a path you follow (Annie Dillard, The Writing Life)